What self-sabotage really looks like for someone who loves Jesus…

Have you ever felt like you’re the one getting in your own way—even in your walk with God?

You’re not alone.

Self-sabotage doesn’t just show up in careers or relationships—it sneaks into our spiritual lives, too.

And as believers, it can be especially confusing because we know God has called us, chosen us, and forgiven us. But still… we struggle. We delay. We doubt. We hide.

Let’s talk about what self-sabotage really looks like for someone who loves Jesus.

  1. Doubting God’s Promises (Even Though You Know Better)

You’ve read the scriptures. You’ve heard the sermons. But something in you still whispers, “What if God’s promises aren’t really for me?”
That quiet doubt can lead to inaction—because if you’re unsure God will come through, why bother stepping out in faith?

  1. Being a Perfectionist in the Name of “Excellence”

Sometimes, we hide behind perfectionism and call it “doing things for God.” But deep down, it’s fear—fear of failing, of disappointing others, of not being good enough.
We forget that God isn’t asking for perfect—He’s asking for obedience and surrender.

  1. Wearing Guilt Like It’s a Spiritual Discipline

You’ve repented. God’s forgiven you. But you keep reliving the past like it’s still who you are.
Guilt is not from God. Conviction leads to freedom—but shame keeps you stuck. And when you’re stuck, you can’t move into what God has for you.

  1. Avoiding Prayer or the Word Because You’re “Off Track”

Ever ghosted God?
You miss a few days in the Word or skip church, and suddenly you feel too far gone to even try again. So you avoid it altogether. But that’s the self-sabotage talking. God’s not waiting to scold you—He’s waiting to love on you.

  1. Talking Down to Yourself—Even in Prayer

You pray, but your prayers sound more like a guilt trip: “God, I know I’m just a mess… I’m always failing You.”
That kind of self-talk isn’t humility—it’s identity confusion. God doesn’t call you by your struggle. He calls you His.

  1. Being Scared of Blessings (Yes, Really)

This one can be sneaky. You ask God for favor or opportunities, and when they come, you shut down or self-destruct.
Why? Because deep down, you don’t feel worthy of good things—even when God is the one giving them.

  1. Isolating Yourself When You Need People Most

You pull away from community, thinking you’ll “get it together” first. But isolation only makes things louder in your head.
God created you for connection—for iron to sharpen iron. Healing often happens in community, not in solitude.

  1. Delaying Obedience Because It Feels Too Big

You know what God’s asking you to do. Start the ministry. Share your testimony. Write the book.
But fear whispers, “What if you fail?” So you stall. Delay. Distract yourself with other things.
But delayed obedience is still disobedience—and deep down, you know that.

  1. Putting More Faith in Self-Help Than the Holy Spirit

Therapy is great. Books are helpful. But when you start relying more on strategies than the Savior, you’re sabotaging your spiritual power.
Worldly wisdom can’t replace godly guidance. It should supplement, not substitute.

The Good News? You Don’t Have to Stay Stuck.

If any of this sounds familiar, don’t beat yourself up. Recognizing the pattern is the first step to breaking it.

Self-sabotage loses its power when we expose it to the light of truth—God’s truth.

You’re not too messy, too far behind, or too broken. You are loved, chosen, called, and equipped.

It’s time to stop standing in your own way—and start stepping into the life God designed for you.

A Prayer for the Insecure Heart 🙏🏾

Insecurities don’t appear overnight. They’re often rooted in:

✅ Childhood experiences

✅ Unrealistic expectations

✅ Trauma and rejection

✅ Internalized lies

When insecurities take root, they create an inner void—a desperate craving for validation, love, and worth. This void pushes individuals toward people-pleasing, over-functioning, and sacrificing boundaries in hopes of securing connection.

The good news? Freedom from codependency starts with addressing the root of insecurities. This includes:

✅ Healing childhood wounds through therapy, faith, and support.


✅ Rebuilding self-worth by embracing your identity apart from others’ approval.


✅ Setting healthy boundaries to protect your emotional and spiritual well-being.


✅ Cultivating God-centered confidence, recognizing that true worth is found in Christ’s love and acceptance.


🙏🏾 LORD,

Heal the wounds that have left me feeling unworthy and unseen.
Help me find my value not in others’ approval but in Your love.

Teach me to set healthy boundaries and to trust that I am enough in You.

Amen 🙏🏾

Transformation Can Happen in your Day to Day Living

You might not feel like a new creation when you’re doing the dishes or getting through your workday.

But that’s where transformation happens—

…in the hidden places,

…the quiet choices, and

…the unseen obedience…

👉🏾 Keep praying. Keep worshiping. Keep showing up. God sees it all. 👈🏾

🙏🏾 Prayer Father,

Teach me to walk in step with You…Help me show up daily—not to earn Your love,

…but, because I already have it!

In Jesus Name, Amen 🙏🏾

The Danger of Deriving Your Identity from Others

In a world of constant comparison and curated perfection, it’s easy to forget who we really are. For many Christian women, identity becomes tangled in roles, responsibilities, and relationships.

We begin to derive our worth from how others see us—or how we think they see us.

But here’s the truth: Deriving your identity from others is not only dangerous—it’s spiritually destructive.

You might not even realize you’re doing it. You look for affirmation in:

  • A spouse’s approval
  • A parent’s validation
  • A boss’s praise
  • A friend’s acceptance
  • Social media likes and comments

When your sense of self rises or falls based on how someone else treats you, you’re living with a fractured identity.

And that’s a heavy burden God never intended for you to carry.

Deriving identity from others often leads to people-pleasing, over-functioning, and unhealthy attachments.

You start living for approval rather than purpose.

👉🏾 ✝️ Your true identity is eternal, unshakable, and not up for debate!

  • You are chosen. (1 Peter 2:9)
  • You are loved. (Romans 8:38–39)
  • You are fearfully and wonderfully made. (Psalm 139:14)
  • You are complete in Him. (Colossians 2:10)

A Prayer for Today:

Father God,

I confess that I’ve allowed others to define me more than I’ve listened to You.

Heal the parts of my heart that seek validation in people, not You.

Remind me daily of who I am in Christ—chosen, loved, whole, and complete.

Let Your truth be the foundation of my identity.

In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Are You Tired of Carrying What God Never Meant for You to Hold?

Unforgiveness is heavy.

It drains our peace, steals our joy, and builds invisible walls between us and the freedom God desires for us.

Many of us carry emotional baggage from past hurts, betrayals, and disappointments—thinking we’re protecting ourselves, but in reality, we’re only prolonging our pain.

It’s time to forgive— to release the offense, surrender the hurt, and receive healing through Christ.

You deserve peace.

You deserve joy.

You deserve to be free.

God’s Word is clear about the importance of forgiveness—not only as a command but as a path to healing.

“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” —Colossians 3:13 (NIV)

Forgiveness doesn’t mean what happened was okay. It means you’re choosing to release the offense and trust God to be your healer and your defender. When we forgive, we make space for God’s peace to move in.

Letting go of unforgiveness isn’t always a one-time decision—it’s often a process. But it begins with one brave step of faith. God doesn’t ask us to do it alone. His Spirit empowers us to forgive, even when it seems impossible.

Here’s how you can begin:

  1. Pray honestly – Tell God how you feel and ask for His strength to release the pain.
  2. Speak forgiveness aloud – Declare it even before your emotions catch up.
  3. Choose to bless – Pray for the person who hurt you. Blessing them breaks the cycle of bitterness.
  4. Remind yourself of God’s grace – You’ve been forgiven much. 

When we forgive, we make space for God’s peace to move in.

It’s time to drop the weight!